It Will Hurt

Anytime the going gets really rough, I revisit why I train.  It is natural to question in when everyone around you starts that well-meaning speech that ends with why you should not "tri" so hard.  People are concerned and that is natural.  As anyone who lives a less than conventional lifestyle will attest, there is constant pressure to "normalize" your life.  It is paired with the implication that a totally conventional existence would somehow eliminate the risks and compensate for every short coming.

There are parts of my life that still need a lot of work.  That does not mean that I should not live fully while I continue to try to close those gaps.  At one point, nutrition was one of those blind spots.  I was 100+ lbs overweight and didn't even recognize it.  I thought I had about 50 to lose.  That is a 50 lb blind spot.  I am fairly sure that the health issues I would be facing without these changes far exceed the bruises and scrapes (OK, massive hematoma and road rash... point still remains the same) that I am suffering now. Changing my relationship with food and a consistent training program has brought me farther than I ever dreamed possible.  The good far outweighs the hardship.

That same consistency has allowed me to achieve results in races, develop my life in a way that focuses on health and well-being, changed my relationship with my job, my body, other people.

I LOVE WHAT I AM DOING WITH MY LIFE.

I love to train.  I love to race.  I love the challenge and direction of my life.

It doesn't mean that I have everything figured out.  It doesn't mean that I ever expect to be done.  It simply means what it says.  I am not going to stop because of a rough patch.  I won't quit riding or riding hard... training, racing, and giving it all I've got.  It would be selling myself short.  This is all part of the process.

I never expected it to be easy...  or painless.