Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Feather Brained Plans!

Tonight I am sitting in a camper with a space heater and lights, recently showered and only kind of freezing.  This is a vast improvement over the earlier portions of the week.

The Plan:  *Work Saturday night, finish about 5 and head 100 miles to Austin.
*Get some sleep.  Pack the car.
*Sunday evening, leave for Plano to pick up the camper.
*Start driving.  Sleep as needed.  *Drop the camper at a friend's in NC on Tuesday.
*Arrive in NJ for Wednesday.
*Be there for Mom during her surgery on Thursday.  Stay until after Christmas.
*Head to FL whenever the customers start showing.  Pick up the camper along the way.

The reality:  *Help another braider Saturday night and not get done until 11 am.  Drive 100 miles home.  *Sleep 2 hours.  Get up, mainline coffee, throw stuff in car.
*Hit weather on the way to Plano.  Finally arrive at 1 am.
*Learn to hook up camper ad sway bars in pouring rain at 40 degrees and strong wind.
*Learn to drive camper in same conditions.
*Lock up brakes trying to stop.  Notice that brake controller was never installed!
*Stop at a gas station and sleep in car because it is raining too hard to get to camper (which has sprung a leak so the interior is soaked).
*Stop in Bossier City, La and have brake controller installed.
*Travel 50 miles.  Hear engine go BOOM! followed by BoomBoomBoomBoom.
*Call AAA.
*Sit on side of road for hours waiting for a tow truck before they call back to say no one is coming.
*Get rescued by state police.
*Spend night in dark, wet camper in wrecker yard.  Tow truck driver has pity and buys breakfast to be nice.
*Get car repaired.  Empty out bank account.
*Get back on road.  Travel 4 hours until sun starts to go down.
*Notice that the dashboard lights are not working.  Stop at rest area to investigate.  Discover that the entire rig (truck and trailer) is dark.
*Realize thanks to iPhone maps and Google that you are 50 miles from the nearest gas station.  Confirm suspicion with nearby trucker.
*Settle in for a night in the wet camper with no heat (furnace is broken and replaced with space heaters) and no power.  Note that the weather is predicting temps in the 20s.
*In morning, try to figure out where fuse box might be.  Consult owners manual.  Ask for help deciphering owners manual.  Give up.  Call RV place.
*Spend too much money to have a fuse upgraded.
*Continue driving into night.
*Stop for coffee two hours from planned stopping point.  Find out that just ahead there is a weather system.  Note truckers comment "the mountain is WHITE!"
*Do GPS search for nearest KOA.  Follow directions.
*Discover directions are wrong.  Back slowly down the country road to a parking lot big enough to allow a turn around.
*Get back on highway.  See sign for KOA at next exit.  Follow signs.
*Spend an hour trying to figure out why the camper won't get power.  Think of breaker.  Discover it tripped.  Flip breaker.  Get power.
*Wonder how the next 800 miles of the trip will go.

You just can't make this stuff up.

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